Chapter Sixty-Two: Refusal (Request for Subscription)

Yan Heru stayed in the pharmacy until nightfall and successfully prepared enough medicine for half a month. She handed the medicine over to Shen Yi.

“This is enough for half a month. I’ve already divided the daily dosage into small packets. You just need to remember to decoct the medicine for the prince each day,” Yan Heru instructed.

Shen Yi looked at the large bundle of medicine in his hands, somewhat puzzled. “Your Highness has always managed these things personally, hasn’t she?”

“I have some matters to attend to outside, so I might not be around for a while. You must decoct the medicine carefully—no one else should be involved. I fear others might try to tamper with it,” Yan Heru replied.

Shen Yi nodded and turned to leave.

Yan Heru glanced up at the moon and sighed. She had been here for quite some time, yet she still felt like an outsider, unable to truly fit in.

She walked to the center of the courtyard and sat on a stone bench, propping her chin in her hand as she reminisced about her life in the modern world.

She once had a very close fiancé, but he betrayed her and ended up with the confidante she trusted most.

It was because of this betrayal that Yan Heru moved to a remote place, dismissing all her attendants. She had never had many friends, so there was no one else to worry about.

Her fiancé had always treated her gently. After so many years of loneliness, she had believed she’d finally found someone she could rely on—never expecting he would be the one to push her into despair.

Since arriving in this world, she often thought about the plane crash whenever she had a moment to herself. The plane belonged to a wealthy tycoon and, if not for sabotage, there should have been no accident. The tycoon had asked her to treat his illness, so he had no reason to harm her.

That left only one possibility: someone close to her had engineered the crash—her confidante, her so-called best friend who had stolen her fiancé.

Even after Yan Heru moved far away, not wanting to see the pair, her confidante still managed to find her, seeking forgiveness.

Yan Heru had never known much affection in her life, so even though she had been betrayed, she still forgave her friend in her heart.

But that plane crash…

Now, Yan Heru couldn’t help but suspect that the one she had trusted most had been behind it all.

Yan Heru couldn’t understand—she had already given everything up. Other than her medical skills, she had nothing left. Was even her medical expertise something worth coveting?

Rubbing her temples at the thought, she felt a wave of vexation. Every time she dwelled on these matters, she grew agitated.

Forget it. There was no point dwelling on the past—it was already over. Whose fault it was no longer mattered. She didn’t even know if she could ever return. Better to live in the present and make the most of her life here.

Yan Heru rose and left the courtyard, returning to her bedchamber. Her attitude toward Shen Hezhi today had been rather harsh. She knew the reason now, though she could not admit it—and neither, it seemed, did he want to.

When Yan Heru entered the room, she startled Shen Hezhi, who was lying in bed. He sat up, looking at her with wounded eyes.

“Why did you refuse me today in public, my lady? Do you intend to abandon me?” Shen Hezhi asked, his voice tinged with grievance.

Yan Heru had never seen Shen Hezhi look so aggrieved. But, remembering her past, she still couldn’t bring herself to accept a new relationship.

“You misunderstand, Your Highness. I only worried that my public practice of medicine might bring you unnecessary trouble, so I didn’t acknowledge you,” Yan Heru replied coolly. With that, she climbed into bed, pulled up the covers, and turned away from him.

Shen Hezhi reached out and embraced her from behind, his voice muffled. “I’ve never felt so wronged in my life. When you refused to recognize me today and wouldn’t come back with me, I felt utterly wretched. But with so many people present, I couldn’t show it.

Yan Heru, I don’t know what spell you’ve cast on me. Though we’ve known each other for less than a month, it feels like I’ve known you for a hundred years—as if we’ve been acquainted forever.

I never believed in love at first sight, but now I have no choice. In daily life, in every small detail, I find myself thinking of you. I wouldn’t admit my feelings before because I was afraid.

There’s always this strange feeling in my heart, as if you might leave me at any moment. I’m frightened. I don’t want to admit that I love you…”

Shen Hezhi’s sudden confession left Yan Heru stunned. She had sensed something different in herself toward this handsome man, but the wounds her former fiancé had left made her afraid to open her heart again.

Moreover, this affection was fraught with danger. If she embraced it, she would face endless trials ahead.

Thinking of this, Yan Heru pressed her lips together. “Your Highness, you must have drunk too much tonight, speaking such nonsense. Go to sleep,” she said, pulling Shen Hezhi’s hand away and falling silent.

But Shen Hezhi did not give up. “You care for me too, don’t you? Otherwise, why were you so unhappy after I took a concubine?”

Yan Heru was startled.

His words suddenly made everything clear—why she had been so listless and irritable these past days, unable to find the reason.

Was this really the cause?

No! It couldn’t be! She couldn’t possibly love Shen Hezhi.

“Your Highness, let’s talk again in the morning, after you’ve sobered up,” Yan Heru insisted, still unable to accept him.

She was afraid. She always felt like a stranger in this world. Aside from her medical skills, she had nothing she could rely on.

And Shen Hezhi…he was a man who seemed out of reach. Yan Heru had arrived here inexplicably; who was to say she wouldn’t suddenly be taken away again? Even if she accepted his feelings and shared his hardships, what if one day she vanished without a trace? What would become of him then?

Yan Heru admitted she had feelings for him, but she knew she couldn’t be so selfish as to leave him alone in the end.

Besides, she believed she hadn’t fallen too deeply for him yet. In this world, she ought to pursue the life she’d always longed for, but never found in the modern world.