Volume One: A Youth Steps into the World Chapter Thirty-Two

Although he had sensed someone approaching him earlier, Fang Tian had not expected it to be Zhou Xiaodie; he assumed it was someone else. He had clearly already escorted her back—why was she here again? Had she followed him all the way? Or was she simply wandering about as well? Fang Tian was unsure and was about to ask, when Zhou Xiaodie spoke first.

“I know what you want to ask—you’re wondering why I’m here,” she said, a playful glint in her eyes as she gazed at him. “If I told you I just had a feeling you’d be in this place, would you believe me?”

Fang Tian smiled gently.

In truth, when Fang Tian had walked her back earlier, she had left the gate slightly ajar, wanting to watch him leave. But she noticed that instead of heading toward his own quarters, he walked off in another direction. When he was some distance away, she slipped out and quietly followed, keeping herself hidden at a distance as she watched him stop at the pavilion by the pond.

Why was Fang Tian not going back to rest so late at night? Did he have something to do? Was he meeting someone? Could there be another woman he liked? But aside from herself, there were no other young women in the Zhou household that he would interact with...

Her mind was filled with all sorts of wild thoughts as she kept her eyes fixed on Fang Tian, wanting to know what he was up to. After watching for a long time, all she saw was him sitting there in a daze, idly tossing stones—not at all like someone with a secret rendezvous. She couldn’t help but feel a little speechless at his behavior: coming out here in the middle of the night just to throw stones—he must be exceptionally bored.

However, in the moonlight, his profile looked even more handsome, and Zhou Xiaodie found herself captivated, watching him for a long while, her heart thoroughly ensnared by his presence.

When she finally realized she was behaving oddly, staring so intently, her cheeks flushed hotly. She clicked her tongue in embarrassment, deciding she should just go back—who knew how long she might keep watching otherwise? She began to turn away, taking half a step, but her gaze still lingered on Fang Tian.

When she saw him sit down in the pavilion, her foot paused, and then she turned around again. Now that Fang Tian was facing her direction, she could see his face clearly. Zhou Xiaodie noticed the look of loss and distraction on his face, as if he were unhappy. On an impulse, she stepped out of hiding and slowly walked toward him.

He seemed unaware of her approach. Zhou Xiaodie smoothed her hair, straightened her wrinkled dress, and walked up to him. Thus, by the little pond in the Zhou family courtyard, the two of them stood face to face in the deep of night, gazing at each other.

Fang Tian, who had been about to leave, halted at her appearance. He stood still, gazing into her face, listening as she spoke with that playful tone, and he found himself equally entranced.

He realized that tonight, he would not be getting any sleep.

Feeling a sudden lightness, Fang Tian teased, “Of course I believe you. How could I not?”

“Brother Fang Tian, you really believe that? I’m not that amazing!”

“So how did you know I’d be here, hmm?”

Her expression grew uneasy at the question, and she stammered,

“Well, I… I… the thing is…”

She couldn’t possibly admit she had followed him all the way here—how mortifying would that be? Thinking quickly, her expression shifted, and she grinned mischievously.

“I couldn’t sleep, and felt bored, so I came out for a stroll! And before I knew it, I’d wandered here—and then I saw you, Brother Fang Tian. What a coincidence, don’t you think?”

Her eyes darted away, not daring to meet his gaze.

“Is that really so? I’m not sure I believe it,” he said.

“Oh, Brother Fang Tian, why do you keep pressing this question? Can’t you ask something else?” she said, a little flustered.

Seeing her discomfort, Fang Tian let the matter drop. “Alright, I won’t ask anymore.”

He had a good idea that Zhou Xiaodie had followed him, but he didn’t mind. He didn’t believe she would have any ulterior motive for doing so, nor did he think she would ever wish him harm. In truth, the calm he had regained earlier had been completely upended by her sudden appearance.

Seeing that he would not pursue the matter, Zhou Xiaodie couldn’t help but want to speak.

“Brother Fang Tian, did you also come here out of boredom?”

“Yes. My mind is tangled with thoughts I want to sort out, so I came here for some quiet.”

“Can you tell me what’s troubling you?”

He sighed. “Mainly, it’s because I’ll be leaving in a few days, and the closer it gets, the more reluctant I feel. I don’t know what to do with these feelings. This past month, spending time with all of you, has warmed a heart that had long been cold. Now, even though I’d made up my mind before, I find I don’t want to leave. Not anymore.”

“Then, Brother Fang Tian—why not just stay, if that’s how you feel?”

“But I still have something important I must do. If I don’t complete it, my life will have no meaning.”

“These two desires are at war inside me, making me choose, making me struggle, leaving me exhausted. That’s why I’m here alone at night, unable to bring myself to leave.”

Now Zhou Xiaodie finally understood why he’d looked so lost before—his heart was torn between these two choices. The realization brought its own ache to her heart.

“Brother Fang Tian, actually you don’t need to torment yourself. If what you must do is truly important, then just go and do it. As long as you remember to come back and visit, I’m sure, besides me, everyone else will remember you too.”

“So, Brother Fang Tian, don’t linger—just keep moving toward your path.”

At this, Zhou Xiaodie could not bear to say more—she was afraid that if she continued, she would beg him to stay. But that would only trouble Fang Tian further, and it was not something she wanted to do. Though she might suffer the bitterness of longing in the future, she could not bring herself to hold him back for the sake of her own feelings.

After hearing her words, Fang Tian sighed.

“I understand everything you’re saying. But do you know what it is I’m most reluctant to leave behind?”

She looked at him in confusion. “What is it?”

“It’s you, silly girl.”

“What?”

“I’m not good at expressing myself—maybe I come across as wooden—but during this time, I don’t know when it started, but you’re always on my mind. I find myself wanting to see you every day. I have this feeling that as long as you are in my world, I will have found the greatest happiness of my life.”

“Xiaodie, I think I’ve fallen in love with you.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

Zhou Xiaodie’s face instantly turned as red as an apple. His sudden confession caught her off guard—she had expressed her feelings before, but she had never heard Fang Tian say anything to show he returned her feelings. She’d thought he considered her only as a younger sister, and that her own affection was one-sided. But now, here he was, telling her how he felt.

Her feelings had finally been answered.

Remembering how she had pretended to be normal every day, hiding her emotions so painfully, tears spilled from her eyes.

Fang Tian reached out and gently wiped away her tears.

“Why are you crying now? It makes me look like I’ve bullied you.”

“It’s all your fault, Brother Fang Tian. You say things like this so late at night, now I’ve cried my face a mess.”

“Alright, blame me, blame me.”

“Hmph!”

“Haha.”

“You’re still laughing!”

“I won’t laugh anymore.”

“That’s better.”

“Xiaodie, you’re really beautiful.”

“Do you need to tell me that?”

Unable to hold back his longing any longer, Fang Tian pulled her into his arms.

“What I mean is, I want to be closer to you, so I can take a good look.”

Resting in his embrace, Zhou Xiaodie’s heart pounded wildly. She dared not move, only speaking softly.

“Brother Fang Tian, when did you become so mischievous?”

“Just now.”

“Should I praise you for being clever?”

“I wouldn’t mind.”

Holding her close, feeling the soft warmth in his arms, Fang Tian gazed down at her. Under his high nose was a delicate mouth, her lips rosy like flower petals touched with dew—irresistibly inviting.

“Xiaodie.”

“Mm?”

Their eyes met, the world around them fading as they gazed into each other’s depths. Slowly, their faces drew closer, eyes fluttering closed.

They kissed, lips meeting, heat blossoming between them as the scent of her hair filled the air. Fang Tian’s arms tightened around her, as if afraid she would vanish. Zhou Xiaodie clung to him as well, pressing herself closer, eagerly responding to his kiss. Their lips entwined, bodies warming, hearts racing, lost in each other as the night deepened.

It was a long while before they finally parted.

“Xiaodie, let me walk you home.”

“Mm.”

At the door to her quarters, Fang Tian was about to leave when Zhou Xiaodie caught his hand.

“Don’t go.”

Seeing her delicate, pleading gaze, Fang Tian swept her into his arms, closed the door with his foot, and carried her to the bed. Looking down at her shy, blushing face, a fire ignited within him. No longer willing to wait, no longer hesitating, he drew the bed curtains and fell upon her.

In that quiet night, driven by longing and affection, the two of them gave themselves over to each other, their love unfurling in the silence of the small courtyard, through a night filled with passion.